Kroner Ministries: equipping the saints for the work of the minsitry

By Sandra Huber of the The Soulful Parent

As the excitement over New Year resolutions is fading away the talk about goals and expectations seems to lessen. Yet, many of us know that setting realistic expectations for our families is more than a New Year”s resolution.  It’s important for the health and well being of our children as well as the adults in the family.  But, how do we set realistic expectations that are fair and reasonable?  How do we know if we are doing it “right”?

One of the most important  lessons I have learned on this journey as a mom and a parent consultant is how important it is to share our values and priorities with our children, while giving them the opportunity to see us meeting our own expectations and goals.

Have clarity about your dreams, goals and expectations for you and your family

I can’t stress this enough. Goals and expectations are an important part of the health and well being of our family but we need to know what it is that we want.

I know sometimes we think  (for our own sanity!) that it is easier to choose to go with the flow.  I always remember what my grandma used to say: “Honey, only dead fish go with the flow”.

Know thyself and thy child

Communicate clearly

All relationships benefit from good communication and when it comes to setting goals and expectations within our family good communication is crucial. If we want our family members to behave in a certain way or to perform a task, it’s important that we spell out our expectations clearly.

In order for our children to be able to achieve any goals and expectations ,they not only have to be reasonable and realistic: they have to be clear, concise and understandable.  If I tell my 5 year old to be “good” because I have a headache, I am not giving her the opportunity to succeed on the task at hand. It is important to be clear when we use words like “good” or “nice”. Telling her “I need you to play quietly for 10 minutes” would better help her understand what I really want her to do.

Remember: Adults cannot read each others’ minds and neither can children.

Sandra is the “soul” and “coach” behind the Soulful Parent. She has worked in Early Intervention, Special Education and has supported many families in the road to successful parenting. She became a PCI Certified Parent Coach® because she’s deeply passionate about changing the world, one family at a time. Sandra believes that life becomes a more enjoyable journey when you lead from your strengths! She can be contacted Sandra {at} thesoulfulparent(.)com and www.thesoulfulparent.com for more information about seminars, presentations and individual coaching services.